


Give Me Something To Hold Onto

by LynyrdSkynyrd



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-23
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-05-22 21:53:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6095200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LynyrdSkynyrd/pseuds/LynyrdSkynyrd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is a new guy in the room 102. Neymar didn't see him, they haven't meet yet. Bu he heard Antonella (the girl who stays in the room 105) talking about the new guy being too quiet and acting strange. Maybe he is a loner, Neymar would like to think so. Maybe he is a misanthropist, Neymar can't judge him. Or he just doesn't care about the lonely and broken souls under this old and rusty roof. This is a possibility. Neymar doesn't pay him any attention, not at the beginning. But later he passes in front of his room and his curiosity takes over him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Give Me Something To Hold Onto

**Author's Note:**

  * For [yulin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yulin/gifts).



He didn't have much with him when he first came to Barcelona. Only a backpack and wearing his mother's ring around his neck. So he wasn't actually disappointed when the first place he found for himself was an old house with lots of rooms and different kind of people staying in those mentioned rooms.

He loved this, to be honest. He grew up in a big family with lots of people wandering around their tiny apartment every Sunday morning, his cousins shouting their lungs out while playing football in the streets and his grandma making sweetest brigadeiros. So even though he doesn't know these people, it was nice to live with many people under the same roof, knowing that he wasn't alone.

It was familiar.

It wasn't strange.

He didn't feel like an alien as he thought or any different than others.

He was as happy as he wished hope to be.

People always have to make difficult decisions. Each day, every day they promise themselves “that's it, this is the last time” but of course they are only lying to themselves. A childish comfort. Because our lives are all about little details and those decisions they lead to. Just like things to do and bills to pay never end. It's an endless circle. And as much as you complain, you know that life wouldn't be same without them. Because you have to fight for something, be it staying alive another day or a movie you are waiting to see for months. Our lives pass as we wait for things to come or happen. And when Neymar made his decision to leave his hometown and come to Barcelona to become a musician, he was not afraid. There was always another option. Even death. No matter what, he doesn't have to live a life that doesn't promise him greatness or happiness.

Of course Neymar learned not wanting or waiting for perfection from life at a very young age. His favorite movie was Pierrot Le Fou back then (it still is), a poetic and political movie by his all time favorite director, Jean Luc Godard. It's always been his favorite but that doesn't mean it comforts him. It's irritating actually, movie changes directions several times, radically jumping from one theme to another. But that's the thing he loves the most. His anarchist humour, him always giving you perfection without making anything perfect. Most people would find it difficult to watch and boring but he was fascinated by it.

He might not expect any perfect fairy tale from life but he was an enthusiastic person and he had dreams. Lots of them, actually. He believed every pain was taking him slowly to greatness, his big hit.

When he was a kid, he would watch biography documentaries with his mother. She was not the biggest movie enthusiast but she wouldn't say no to a good documentary. His mother was interested in royalty and period movies. She has never dreamed of being a princess or queen but she often dreamed of herself wearing those soft looking expensive dresses. She was also interested in interesting stories of people. And that's why they would spend their afternoon lying on the couch, watching a documentary almost every day after school.

“Every one of those people,” Neymar said once, “have interesting life stories.”

“Of course.” His mother said sweetly. “to achieve greatness, you have to suffer first. Like being in the water, to reach the top, you always hit the bottom, no?” Neymar nods happily. He loved swimming. “I guess that's what makes them so special. Look at Edith Piaf, if I went through half of the things she had, I would give up. And that's why I am not her. This is why she is the one who reached the greatness.”

“But, mom,” Neymar said confusedly, “Edith Piaf wasn't happy at all.” Then his mother looked at him meaningly.

“Greatness doesn't always mean happiness, Neymar. To be honest, it's very rare to see those people happy.”

He didn't understand what she meant back then. It was weird to him, why wouldn't some who achieve their dream be happy? What's there to be sad about when you are famous, successful and rich?

Later, he understood.

Life is never that easy.

So he started to say _“Perfection is a lie, happiness is a illusion. Only reality is success.”_ And Oscar, a guy from his class, called him 'a gothic kid trapped in an adult's body'. Neymar smiled, didn't say anything. He doesn't expect Oscar to understand. He saw people like Oscar before. They think they are happy, that they are living the perfect life. A big house, good education, loving and caring lover, understanding parents and huge group of friends. Neymar didn't say it of course but he thinks it's bullshit. Oscar doesn't live, he's simply dying. Waiting for another day to pass, not leaving any mark on people's lives. On the other hand, he's sure this is exactly what Oscar thinks about him. But there's no place for pity or regrets in his life now. Neymar lives his life fully in his own way.

 

 

Javier's parents died when he was 19. It was an accident but even seeing the man who killed them by driving drunk getting into jail didn't do much for his broken heart. He was confused first, not knowing what to do. Later he realized that no one, not even his parents' friends or family, can help him. He has to do it himself. He was 19, he was too old to hide behind older people but too young to face the world alone.

First thing first.

He needed money. Because college could wait, his friends would show sempathy but life was cruel and government wasn't understanding. No one would show him mercy in real life, they would't listen his pathetic excuses or pains that rip his heart out. No, he has bills to pay and needs money to buy food for himself.

His parents weren't rich. But they were living in this huge house since he was 10. It was his grandmother's house and when she died, his mother couldn't find it in herself to sell the last thing left from their glory days. A small piece of happy memories.

Javier doesn't remember if he liked the house at the beginning. It was old, too big for 3 people and you could shoot a horror movie in there without needing any effect. Still, there was something fascinating about this house.

He thought about selling it at first. Yes, the house was old but it was in the middle of the city and it has lots of rooms. Javier was sure he'd get a good amount of money for this.

But then something has changed.

It was his friend Xavi who told him not to sell the house. “Why would you sell it?”, he said once. “Rent your spare rooms.”

“Do you think this would work?” Javier asked uncertainly. “Where would I live then?”

“Here.” Xavi answered, rolling his eyes to make Javier feel like an idiot. “This house has 4 or 5 rooms that you can rent. You can stay in your old room. It is a big house, you don't have to see these people most of time. And think about it, not being alone all the time must be good.”

“Yeah.” He said simply, he was still not convinced.

But what is stopping him?

He didn't actually want to sell the house. His mother loved it. He could earn money without selling the house, he'd keep his room locked during the day. As Xavi said, he doesn't have to see these people most of the time. It could work.

It did.

His first flatmate was a guy named Dani Alves. He was at the same age as Javier himself, 20 at the time being. He was the opposite of Javier, has tattoos all over his body, talking too much and too loudly, wearing clothes that Javier doesn't know where to buy. He was wearing lots of jewelries and his smile was wide, sense of humour was.. interesting.

But he was a likable guy.

Xavi was right, it wasn't so bad.

Their other flatmate came when they were 22, she was 18. She just moved out of her family's house, coming from Argentina. Javier liked her immediately, finding another fellow Argentinian was so nice. She was sweet, polite and nice. Her name was Antonella Roccuzzo and everything was going better than Javier expected.

Then Gerard Piqué came. He was loud like Dani but he was different. His sense of humour was different, his pranks were annoying and he was tall, big, goofy. Javier didn't like him at the beginning. He was too... childish. Javier was 24. Gerard was 20. There wasn't much age difference but he was still a child to Javier. But then one day while Javi was struggling with his school project, Gerard sat with him all night, helping him to sort his papers out, organizing them quietly and offering him coffee. Javier felt so bad after that night, for judging Gerard too early. They weren't still so close, at least Javier wasn't (Gerard was everyone's best friend as he would like to say). But they had a good thing going on.

Neymar came 2 years after Gerard. He was 19. He was not talkative at the beginning but when Dani returned from his vacation with coworkers, they bonded quickly. Javier knew what it means to find another fellow citizen in a different country. Neymar started to smile and laugh more often. He was annoying sometimes but something about the kid was so sweet and innocent that Javier couldn't find in himself to dislike him. Neymar was the last one until Lionel Messi walked in.


End file.
